Archive for February, 2018

The Road to Healing Takes Time

Originally Published in Pocketful of Chelles Blog

By Michelle Kohlhof / February 19, 2018

Last week was tough. The world witnessed a tragedy that has become all too familiar, another school shooting. A day that was supposed to be about love and peace, turned dark and cold for so many. On the day after, when I dropped my little dude, Jason, off at his school, he dashed into his classroom shoving his backpack into his cubby, and my heart just broke into pieces for the families of the victims in Parkland, FL.

How could one person take seventeen beautiful souls, most of them being children? We ask ourselves why did this have to happen, we say prayers for the families who now have to learn how to move on without their child, and we call on congress for change, yet again. It’s hard to imagine how you go on after such a devastating tragedy. Simple things like going back to work, seem like mountains to climb. While we look for answers, one thing is for sure; time doesn’t stand still for the ones who need it to the most. Instead, you learn how to compromise with time, and make the most of what he gives you. We find ourselves pleading for time to just stand still, to have just five more minutes with the ones we love. But you see, time doesn’t wait for no one, and this is why there is more to life than the nine-to-five grind.

We find our humanity—our will to live and our ability to love—in our connections to one another.― Sheryl Sandberg, Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy

As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, last week was tough. Sometimes you don’t get a “do over”. What you do get is a chance to put things in perspective, and not take the life you’ve been blessed with for granted. So on a whim, my husband, Travis, says to me, “you know, we can take a road trip, South, and hang out with your parents”. So, we took advantage of the long weekend (President’s Day), loaded up the truck, and off we went! And as you can imagine with a nine hour drive, I had time to reflect, time to think, and time to write…

All this time got me thinking, how can employers and HR support employees through grief and loss? Are bereavement leave policies enough? I started to research this and one article from SHRM stood out. Click here to read more. In a time of unspeakable loss, what are some big things that HR can do to support their employees and organization?

1) It’s more than policy – It’s about having a plan:

To my fellow HR professionals, let’s work together with management and executives to create a plan to support employees in their time of need. We should do more than just contact the employee and share information about our organization’s bereavement policy. One great example is what Ernst & Young did last year. They provided dedicated HR support to the family of one of their employees who was critically hurt in the Las Vegas mass shooting tragedy. Thankfully, this EY employee survived, and her story showed us that having a plan can lessen the burden on the employee and her family. It shows us that an employer can really champion for their employees when they need us to the most.

2) It’s time to lead the way:

What can we do to prepare fellow employees for a grieving employee’s return to work?  There are a lot of emotions that the employee will still be dealing with upon his return. There will be lack of focus, and difficulty with concentrating, even on the simplest of tasks. We as HR professionals have to partner with management on creating a smooth path for the grieving employee as they return to the workplace. We need to lead the way in helping the grieving employee navigate back into the environment. It is vital for his success.

3) Give some space – It takes time:

I think the single most important thing we can do to help a grieving employee return to work is to give space. What if we created a private place where the grieving employee can go to take a break when she is feeling overwhelmed with emotions? These emotions will come in waves and it is important to give space.

Some “Chelles” find their way to shore, while some live in the sea for eternity. ― Michelle Kohlhof

My closing thought, take the time to set eyes on the ones you love, and are blessed to still have in your life. It’s another chance to fill your pocket full of “Chelles”.

 

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Tips and Benefits of Journaling for Therapy

For centuries, journaling has been a tool for self-discovery. With reflective writing, your words do not have to be carefully arranged. It’s your private world and your private thoughts. You can ramble. Mention the unthinkable. Explore ideas with no worry about the consequences.

Writing as personal therapy

Journaling can help us turn a jumbled set of feelings into a coherent story. It can give us a better sense of ourselves as the author of our lives rather than a victim of circumstances. Research on writing as “expressive therapy” has revealed that it can:

Some guidance

You or your loved one may wish to try journaling. Great! A few caveats. Studies have shown:

How to get the most out of journaling

 

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Study Encourages Having a Bucket List Talk

Talking to Doctors About Your Bucket List Could Help Advance Care Planning

February 8, 2018 by Stanford University Medical Center

For physicians, asking patients about their bucket lists, or whether they have one, can encourage discussion about making their medical care fit their life plans, according to a study by researchers at the Stanford University School of Medicine.

A bucket list is a list of things you’d like to do before you die, like visiting Paris or running a marathon. It’s a chance to think about the future and put lifelong dreams or long-term goals down on a piece of paper.

For doctors, knowing their patients‘ bucket lists is a great way to provide personalized care and get them to adopt healthy behaviors, said VJ Periyakoil, MD, clinical associate professor of medicine, who said she that she routinely asks her patients if they have a bucket list.

“Telling a patient not to eat sugar because it’s bad for them doesn’t work nearly as well as saying, for example, if you are careful now, you will be able to splurge on a slice of wedding cake in a few months when your son gets married,” Periyakoil said.

The study will be published Feb. 8 in the Journal of Palliative Medicine. Periyakoil, an expert in geriatrics and palliative care, is lead author.

The researchers, who surveyed 3,056 participants across the United States, found that by far the majority of respondents—91 percent—had made a bucket list. Survey results also showed that respondents who reported that faith and spirituality were important to them were more likely to have made a bucket list. The older the respondents were, the more likely they were to have a bucket list, and, not surprisingly, those younger than 26 tended to include more “crazy things” on their lists, such as skydiving.

Bucket list categories

Six general themes tended to describe the items on respondents’ bucket lists: 79 percent included travel; 78 percent included accomplishing a personal goal, such as running a marathon; 51 percent included achieving a life milestone, such as a 50th wedding anniversary; 16.7 percent included spending quality time with friends and family; 24 percent included achieving financial stability; and 15 percent included a daring activity.

“When you just Google the term ‘bucket list,’ it’s huge how much interest there is in this,” Periyakoil said. “It provides a very nice framework for thinking about your life goals, health and your mortality.”

Past research has found that when doctors talk to patients—especially those with chronic or terminal illnesses—about the patients’ goals for future care, it can be a vital part of the advance-care planning process. But it’s often awkward to have these conversations, particularly when they are about the end of life, the study said.

“If a patient wants to attend a beloved grandchild’s wedding or travel to a favored destination, treatments that could potentially prevent her from doing so should not be instituted without ensuring her understanding of the life impact of such treatments,” the study said.

Discussing a patient’s bucket list is just a good way to start these conversations, Periyakoil said. Most people are far more open to talking about their life’s goals in this context before filling out an advance directive, a written statement of a person’s wishes regarding medical treatment at the end of life, Periyakoil said.

‘Find out what actually motivates them’

“It’s important for physicians to talk to patients and find out what actually motivates them,” she said. She encourages both doctors and patients to bring up the topic of a bucket list. By discussing how a treatment or surgery might affect the patient’s life, and then discussing what the patient’s goals are, the best possible care plan can be laid out, she said.

“I had a patient with gall bladder cancer,” Periyakoil said. “He was really stressed because he wanted to take his family to Hawaii but had treatment scheduled. He didn’t know he could postpone his treatment by two weeks. When doctors make recommendations, patients often take it as gospel.”

After an informed discussion about his options and the side effects of the cancer treatments, he and his physician decided to postpone the treatment. He made the trip to Hawaii with his family, then returned to start cancer treatments, the study said.

“Patients don’t see the relevance of an advance directive,” said Periyakoil. “They do see the relevance of a bucket list as a way to help them plan ahead for what matters most in their lives.”

Explore further: Most physicians would forgo aggressive treatment for themselves at the end of life

More information: Vyjeyanthi S. Periyakoil et al, Common Items on a Bucket List, Journal of Palliative Medicine (2018). DOI: 10.1089/jpm.2017.0512

Journal reference: Journal of Palliative Medicine

 

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Veterans Can Access Mental Health Services

Most Vets Don’t Know What Mental Health Services VA Offers. So Here You Go

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Roughly half of all post-9/11 veterans who may need mental health care do not seek it through the Department of Veterans Affairs or in the private sector, according to a recent report by the National Academy of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine.

Alarmingly, the report also says a significant number of veterans are unaware of the services available to them from the Veterans Health Administration — the VA’s medical arm.

Veterans who need mental health care but haven’t sought VA help cite several reasons, including “that they do not know how to apply for VA mental health care benefits, they are unsure whether they are eligible, or they are unaware that VA offers these benefits,” according to the Congressionally mandated Jan. 31 report.

“I was dismayed to learn how many veterans didn’t know how to access care,” Ralph Bozella, Chairman the of Veterans Affairs and Rehabilitation Commission for The American Legion, told Task & Purpose. “The VA has done a great job advertising their mental healthcare services on the web and via social media.”

But, he added, “At this point, I think the entire veteran community needs to do more to ensure veterans in need link up with the care they require. We all need to play a more active role here.”

To help with that, here’s a list of mental health services the VA provides to recently transitioned veterans.

Are you a combat vet?

Veterans who served in a combat zone can receive medical services — including mental health care — for five years through the VA, beginning the day of their discharge. This isn’t the same as having a service-connected disability rating; instead, think of it as free health insurance. Eligible vets will have free care and medications for any condition that might be related to their service; there’s no enrollment fee or premium, but you do have to cover copayments. This also opens you up to the VA’s CHOICE program, which means you can receive care through a private-sector specialist at the VA’s expense, not yours.

Soon, every transitioning vet can receive a year of mental health care through the VA.

Last month President Donald Trump signed the executive order “Supporting Our Veterans During Their Transition from Uniformed Service to Civilian Life.” It expands VA mental health care services to the 60% of recently separated vets who were previously deemed ineligible — usually because they lack a verified service-connected disability or service in a combat zone. Beginning in March, all transitioning service members with an honorable discharge will be eligible for 12 months of mental health care through the VA. Though the details of the program are still being worked out, veterans will be eligible to receive care at VA facilities — or in the private sector through CHOICE, if a local clinic can’t meet their needs.

Related: Here’s What We Know About Trump’s Executive Order To Combat Veteran Suicide »

Emergency mental health care is available for veterans with OTH discharges.

Though the executive order provides a year of care to many veterans, it doesn’t cover those with “bad paper” discharges — punitive discharges that preclude access to Veteran Affairs benefits, like education and health care. But last March, the VA launched a separate program offering emergency mental health services for veterans with other-than-honorable discharges. Though not all vets with bad paper are eligible, those with an OTH discharge in need of emergency mental health care can receive treatment through the Veterans Health Administration for up to 90 days — inpatient, residential, or outpatient care.

The VA offers much more if you’re enrolled in their system, though.

Veterans who qualify to register with the Veterans Health Administration enjoy a variety of mental health services. These include counseling, therapy, and, often, a treatment plan that includes prescribed medication. The range of coverage is fairly expansive, with experts able to offer support to veterans suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, depression, substance abuse, and stress, among other concerns. Additionally, the VA offers short-term inpatient care for vets suffering from life-threatening mental illness; outpatient care to a psychological rehabilitation and recovery center; video conferencing with a care provider; and residential rehab programs.

If you need immediate help, or just someone to talk to, resources are always available.

For those in need of immediate support, responders with the Veterans Crisis Line can be reached by calling 1-800-273-8255 and pressing 1; via text, by sending a message to 838255; or online. The conversations are confidential and the line is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week year-round, and the staff is trained to assist veterans of all ages and circumstances.

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