Author Archive
The Ugly Car
On My Way Home
After a particularly harrowing Friday in the Volunteer Department, my coworker Ruth decided we should go home early as a reward for making it through the day. I was ready to bolt when Ruth told me she had a little side trip for me to make “on my way home”. The wife of a patient needed a ride, and according to Ruth’s brain, they lived close to me. I gladly accepted the assignment with gleeful thoughts of getting a jump-start on Houston’s Friday afternoon traffic mayhem.
Eager to leave early, I immediately went to the patient care center to meet the patient and his wife. I was a bit shocked when I noticed Mrs. G.’s aqua hair — not be confused with the socially acceptable “blue” tint of my grandmother’s social set. That should have been my first clue about her unique personality. But no, I trusted Ruth and forged ahead not thinking twice that a lady with aqua hair might be rather ‘interesting’. Her frail husband thanked me repeatedly. They were such a cute, sweet little elderly couple, and taking her home was a small price to pay for getting to leave early, or so I thought.
She Gawked at My Car
I slowly pulled my almond gold PT Cruiser with the chrome package out of the garage and stopped in front of Mrs. G. who was waiting in her assigned spot. She gawked at my car, then at me and 
hesitated before she finally got in. She looked from side to side as she inspected every inch of my car. Then, she shook her head and said, “My friend and I wondered who bought these ugly little cars.”
There are two camps when it comes to PT Cruisers, love or hate, no in between. Mrs. G. was definitely on the hate side. She told me about every two minutes how ugly she thought my car was. She could not understand why Chrysler made such an ugly car. Her husband had a Chrysler and it ran good. Chrysler made nice, dependable, cars but she had no idea what they were thinking when they made these ugly ones. Deriding my car was only interrupted with detailed driving instructions. “Stay in this lane, don’t pass that bus, slow down, turn here, watch that!”
Nice People Drive Ugly Cars
When we finally entered her neighborhood, which was nowhere close to mine, driving instructions and ugly car comments were complimented by a running commentary on the stores where she shopped, where they got their gas, where they bought auto parts for their good looking Chrysler and what streets had potholes. I inched along, dodging every aforementioned, pre-announced pothole. About half way down her lengthy street, Mrs. G. pointed to her house. It was the one on the left where three men stood on the porch eyeing my car. “They’ll never expect me to be in this thing,” she giggled. All three men rose as we approached. Through squinting eyes one of them recognized Mrs. G. and came to open the door for her. Before getting out, Mrs. G. took one last wide-eyed gander around her and announced, “I’ll have to tell my friend that nice people drive these ugly cars!”
As I left Mrs. G. and her three friends, I called Ruth. She did not answer. She had left early, without any side trips.
—Patsy Piner
Houston Hospice Volunteer of the Year
It Wouldn’t Be Monday Without Debbie
Eleven-year volunteer, Debbie Hoelscher, has been named volunteer of the year by Houston Hospice. As a nonprofit organization, Houston Hospice relies upon over 300 volunteers to help set the tone for the compassionate care patients and families receive. Since 2003, Debbie Hoelscher has volunteered in both the inpatient care center and in patients’ homes. Volunteer Coordinator, Patsy Piner said, “It wouldn’t be Monday at hospice without Debbie here tending the flowers, tending the patients, and bringing serenity and calmness into our lives.”
Volunteering With Hospice Isn’t For Everyone
About her work in hospice Debbie states, “The families truly appreciate the smallest gift of your time and doing this type of work gives me a great sense of gratefulness.” Debbie also trains incoming volunteers and many have noted her ability to engage and be at ease with patients and their families. Ms. Piner added, “We often say that volunteering with hospice is not for everyone, but Debbie has a gift for this type of work and we are glad she spends her Mondays with us.”
Volunteers are an integral part of nonprofit Houston Hospice’s team; serving patients and families with caring expertise in the Houston Hospice care center, in patients’ homes and in assisted living facilities. To learn more about volunteering at Houston Hospice, call 713-467 7423 or visit www.houstonhospice.org.
-Karla Goolsby, Houston Hospice Communication Specialist
Service of Remembrance Brings Closure for Hospice Worker
Every six months Gloria Garza coordinates a service of remembrance. Gloria’s been putting together these biannual observances for 15 years; since she came to work for Houston Hospice in 2000. 
She invites families, makes sure the ceremony runs smoothly, and organizes a reception with food and punch. At the service on April 30, 2015 at St. Thomas’ Episcopal Church in Wharton, 135 people were remembered. “This event means a lot to our families. They get the opportunity to see the staff that helped them with their loved ones again,” said Gloria. “And, we get to see how the families are doing. After the service, we walk over to the fellowship hall and have refreshments and the families talk to the staff and exchange stories, hugs, tears, and appreciation for the care and for the service they just attended.”
The services of remembrance began when hospice employees realized that both they and the community needed a way to honor their patients and to have closure. After fifteen years of planning some thirty services, the April 30 observance was different for Gloria. As usual prayers were recited, music was played, and, as their loved ones’ names were called, families were invited to the altar to light a candle. However this time, the name of Gloria’s mother, Lena Quintanilla, was among those called.
Lena, the family matriarch, suffered a massive stroke on January 8, 2015. Four days later her doctor told the family there was nothing more they could do. Gloria responded saying, “Call Houston Hospice now.” As a hospice employee, she knew she had a right to select the hospice of her choice, and because she was designated as her mother’s medical power of attorney agent, she knew it was what Lena wanted. “We already talked about what she wanted and what I should do,” said Gloria. “It made it so much easier. I had a hard decision to make. Even if it was not what I wanted, I had to honor what she wanted. She didn’t want to linger. She didn’t want to be a burden.” Gloria feels strongly about Medical Powers of Attorney and Living Wills. After she helps her siblings complete theirs, she plans to speak to community groups and help others, so that their wishes can be carried out should they become incapacitated.
Lena Quintanilla was a doting and energetic mother of five, and she had touched countless lives working as a hospice volunteer since June 2004. “She was a loving and caring mommy to me and to
Gloria Garza and Lena Quintanilla
everyone that knew her. She could cook Spanish rice and hot sauce like no one else. Just ask our El Campo office,” said Gloria. “My father is grappling with how to go on. She did everything for him. They were married for 72 years. She was only 14 and he was 17 when they got married. She did everything around the house. She even paid the bills. All he did was work and he was a good provider with only a second grade education.”
“About 40 people attended and the service was beautiful and peaceful,” said Gloria. “I’m normally busy helping. I sat back by the pianist like I always do, but this time my family was there. It [the service] helped us to take it in and gave us some closure that this really did happen. It means our loved ones are not forgotten and we have to go on.” Gloria stilled a slight quaver that threatened to expose her sorrow and continued, “My oldest sister, who lives in Clear Lake came and she was so touched that we do this every six months. She told me she wants to come to the next one. I asked why since she wouldn’t know anyone and she said she would light another candle for mama.”
Houston Hospice is Houston’s only nonprofit hospice, providing care for patients and families throughout ten counties. To learn more about the local bereavement services offered by Houston Hospice, visit www.houstonhospice.org, or call 979-578-0314 or 800-420-6193.
-Karla Goolsby, Houston Hospice Communication Specialist
Pat Matthes: A Heart for Hospice
After a long career dedicated to helping others, Bay City native, Pat Matthes, is retiring at the end of May. Pat has served as a Social Worker for Houston Hospice for thirteen years.
Pat Matthes
During that time, he regularly traveled throughout a 50-mile radius of his El Campo office; helping patients and families during their times of greatest need.
Pat’s career as a Social Worker began in 1976. During an almost 40-year career he worked in private practice, helped special needs patients in Bay City, and tried his hand at Hospital Administration before filling a rewarding niche as a Social Worker for Houston Hospice. “I love my job very much,” said Pat. “I love the team. I love the people at Houston Hospice. They’re a class act.” When asked what he’ll miss most Pat answered, “I’m going to miss hearing people’s stories. There are always beautiful stories in hospice.”
Pat’s colleagues anticipate that his absence will be strongly felt. Houston Hospice Professional Relations Liaison, Tiffany Livanec said, “If there was a national ‘Heart of Hospice’ award, Pat would certainly be the recipient. I’ve rarely met anyone who didn’t know him, and I’ve never met anyone who didn’t sing his praises. He will definitely be greatly missed.”
Volunteer Coordinator, Gloria Garza said of Pat, “We have been together for so many years with Houston Hospice – El Campo. He is an amazing, compassionate and kind soul. I am greatly going to miss my friend!”
Pat’s not exactly sure what he’ll do in retirement, but he knows it will involve helping people. He plans to volunteer for First Baptist Church of Bay City where he’s a member. Pat said he likes building things and looks forward to helping the Baptist Men’s Association, a group that provides assistance in the aftermath of disaster. He said he might consider volunteering with hospitals and hospice too.
Houston Hospice is Houston’s only nonprofit hospice, providing care for patients and families throughout ten counties. To learn more about Pat’s retirement celebration or the local services offered by Houston Hospice, visit www.houstonhospice.org, or call 979-578-0314 or 800-420-6193.
-Karla Goolsby, Houston Hospice Communication Specialist
The Man in Overalls
The volunteer called and said she would not be able to make her regular shift at the reception desk. As the Volunteer Coordinator, it fell to me to sit at the desk that afternoon. It happened to be a very busy day. Four patients were admitted in just two hours. I was frantically trying to keep up when a man clad in bib overalls came in the front door. He looked around slowly and approached the desk. He told me his wife was coming to the Hospice from M.D. Anderson Cancer Center that afternoon. He wanted to know what room she would be in. I gave him the information, offered him a cup of coffee and invited him to make himself comfortable while he waited for the ambulance to bring his wife.
After he got his coffee, I expected him to go into the family room or go to his wife’s room to wait. Instead, he just stood there, looking at me with woefully sad eyes. The silence was heavy. I didn’t really know what to say; lots of things were racing through my mind. I was searching for something brilliant, meaningful, perhaps even profound, to say to make him feel better. I was coming up with nothing when I remembered volunteer training. Maybe this was one of those times when silence was the best choice.
So, I stopped what I was doing, looked at him and smiled, just a little. With a heavy sigh, he put his callused hands up on the ledge and began to talk, very slowly. He talked of his wife’s cancer, of her pain and of his pain, as a result of hers. He talked about his daughter and how she helped so much. He talked about his wife wanting to stay with her sister if she stabilized enough to leave here. He said he really didn’t like staying anywhere except home but right now his wishes didn’t matter much. He said all he wanted was for her not to hurt, be as happy as she could be and make the most of the time she had left. He was willing to do whatever it took, even sleep in a strange bed, if that is what she wanted.
He looked off in the distance, shook his head and told me about the many people he and his wife had helped over the years. These same people were nowhere to be found now that they could use some friendly support. His eyes became teary as he shared how the parking lot attendant at M.D. Anderson had only charged him for one day’s parking after he lost his ticket and told her he had been there for at least three days.
He marveled at how a complete stranger could be so kind when lifelong friends didn’t even call. His voice cracked as he wondered out loud why these people couldn’t just say it was too hard to visit and see his wife so sick. Instead, they said nothing and their silence really hurt. He hung his head, wiped a tear from his cheek and asked where he could smoke. After I told him, he turned slowly and left, without another word.
I sat there quietly thinking about what had just occurred. I felt so privileged to have been allowed to listen as this gentle man poured out his hurts, to me, a stranger. I don’t know why he chose me, except maybe he took the silence that I wrestled with as an invitation to say what had probably been on his mind and in his heart for a very long time. I hope he felt better after he talked. I know listening to him was a gift for me. I learned valuable lessons from that man in bib overalls. I learned never to put off calling a hurting friend, even if I don’t know what to say. I know and I care says it all.
By the way, I also learned not to judge men in bib overalls!
-Patsy Piner, Houston Hospice Volunteer Coordinator
GIRL WHO INSPIRED “THE FAULT IN OUR STARS” STILL INSPIRES WITH HELP FROM HER PARENTS
Esther Grace Earl’s short life inspired the bestselling book, The Fault in Our Stars and the blockbuster movie of the same name. Since her death in 2010 she is far from forgotten as her parents prepare to bring her story to Houston and extend Esther Grace’s exuberant influence on Thursday, April 2 at the 2015 Houston Hospice Butterfly Luncheon.
Lori and Wayne Earl, Esther’s parents and co-authors of New York Times Bestseller and Goodreads Choice 2014 winner This star won’t go out: The Life & Words of Esther Grace Earl, will share the amazing story of Esther Grace; her battle with cancer and her wit, courage and unflappable spirit that inspired one of the biggest teen phenomena of our era. With Esther as muse, John Green’s The Fault in Our Stars explored the funny, thrilling and tragic business of being alive and in love.
People Magazine gave This star won’t go out 4 stars saying, “This moving read will have you reaching for the tissues and smiling with delight. Stunningly alive on the page, Esther shows that sometimes the true meaning of life—helping and loving others—can be found even when bravely facing death.”
Together, Lori and Wayne contributed to and curated the memoir of their daughter, Esther Grace Earl. One of five children, Esther was diagnosed with thyroid cancer when she was 12-years old. Before losing her battle with cancer in 2010, Esther’s friendship with John Green became the inspiration for the book and movie, The Fault in Our Stars.
Inspired by their daughter’s energy and natural empathy, Esther’s parents set up the non-profit foundation This Star Won’t Go Out (TSWGO). The foundation works to serve families with children diagnosed with life-threatening cancer. To date, TSWGO has given away $200,000 in financial grants.
Lori Earl works as an Instructor and Student Success Coach at Quincy College. A certified secondary English teacher, with degrees in Psychology and Intercultural Studies, she is passionate about encouraging others to move towards wholeness, live life fully, and make a difference in their world.
Lori and Wayne Earl – Photo Credit Jesse Costa
Wayne Earl has taught philosophy for many years at Quincy College and he taught English overseas in Belgium and Saudi Arabia. Additionally, Wayne has served several churches as a protestant minister in Massachusetts and France and worked as an ecumenical chaplain for Volunteers of America, a social services organization that focuses its work serving the very neediest. In college and seminary Wayne studied psychology and theology and he recently completed doctoral studies in Spirituality and Story at Wesley Seminary in Washington, DC. His doctoral project focused on young adult grief and resilience and is entitled: Giving Sorrow Words: Helping Young Adult Grief Find Its Voice.
The Butterfly Luncheon supports a cause that is very close to the Earl’s hearts — it benefits the operations of Houston Hospice and provides the primary funds to support the Butterfly Program. The Houston Hospice Butterfly Program was established in 1996 to provide for the distinct hospice needs of infants and youth aged 18 and younger. The program includes perinatal services for families who have received a prenatal diagnosis indicating their infant will likely have a limited lifespan. A Butterfly Team consisting of physicians, nurses, chaplains, social workers, aides and volunteers with expertise in children’s physical and emotional well-being, is devoted to caring for children and their families. The Butterfly Program’s maxim is, “Measure not the length of their days, but the grace of their flight.”
On behalf of Chairmen Lesha and Tom Elsenbook, the community is invited to attend the Butterfly Luncheon and be inspired by Esther Grace, through her parents Lori and Wayne Earl, on Thursday, April 2, 2015 at the beautiful Houstonian Hotel located at 111 North Post Oak Lane, Houston, Texas 77024. Individual tickets and table reservations are available at www.houstonhospice.org. For more information about the Houston Hospice Butterfly Program and Luncheon, visit www.houstonhospice.org or call 713-677-7123.
Founded in 1980, Houston Hospice has evolved from an alternative, grass roots concept to a leader in hospice care for people of all ages and walks of life. Houston’s oldest, largest, independent hospice is a nonprofit organization that is community-based and community-supported. Houston Hospice serves Texans from all socio-economic groups irrespective of ethnicity or beliefs. Care is provided in-home and in residential facilities throughout Austin, Brazoria, Colorado, Fort Bend, Harris, Jackson, Matagorda, Montgomery, Waller and Wharton Counties. Inpatient and respite care is provided through the Margaret Cullen Marshall Hospice Care Center located in the Texas Medical Center.
-Karla Goolsby
HOSPICE SERVICES SUPPORT THE LOVING CARE OF FAMILIES
As our population ages, medical professionals are finding that cultural factors influence the decisions of the patients and their families as their illnesses progress. End of life care involves a time of
Dr. Hanh Trinh
medical, financial, and emotional changes for patients and their families. Patients can be referred to hospice when they are diagnosed with a terminal condition with a prognosis of 6 months or less. Hospice provides a team-oriented method of addressing not just physical pain, but also spiritual and emotional pain.
The cost of hospice care is covered entirely by Medicare and Medicaid for patients with these benefits. For those patients with private insurance, verifying benefits with the insurance company is important prior to signing on. The hospice team can provide services wherever the patient lives, whether that is in a home, an assisted living facility, or a nursing home. In the case that the patient has uncontrolled symptoms of pain, nausea, shortness of breath, or restlessness, hospice has inpatient facilities which may provide a higher level of care.
Having a hospice team to address their concerns and a 24-hour hospice nurse to call can provide families with the peace of mind that they are not alone, even in their most trying times. The hospice team can follow patients and families on their journey through illness; from the time their active treatments are no longer beneficial, to comforting moments enriched by hospice’s supportive care when patients can be among their loved ones. To learn more about hospice comfort care visit www.houstonhospice.org or call 713-467-7423 (713-HOSPICE).
Thuy Hanh Trinh, MD
Thuy Hanh Trinh, MD, MBA, FAAFP, FAAHPM, WCC, is an Associate Medical Director at Houston Hospice in Houston, Texas. She received her medical degree from Louisiana State University Health Science Center in New Orleans and trained in family medicine at Baylor College of Medicine. Following residency, she completed her geriatric fellowship at Baylor College of Medicine and her palliative medicine fellowship at M.D. Anderson Cancer Center. She joined Houston Hospice in 2007 and serves as the Education Liaison.
A Bucket List Fishing Tale
One day late last summer, the Houston Hospice Intake Team was answering calls as usual on a Wednesday morning when my colleague, Marcy Antiuk, received an unexpected call, and an unusual request. A doctor phoned to tell us that her patient wanted to be admitted to our inpatient hospice care center, but he had one last desire before discontinuing treatments and surrendering to his disease. You see, this man’s disease had progressed to the point that ceasing treatment would decrease his life expectancy to a matter of days. He needed to be transitioned to hospice services that day due to symptom management issues, but first, he wanted to go on one last fishing trip. In fact, . Working in the hospice field, we’re accustomed to satisfying end-of-life requests, and we often grant day passes out of our facility for this purpose. These are typically outings to visit other family members or to have a meal out. Journeying to the edge of our coverage area for several hours was not an issue. However, this man had a severe and painful wound at the base of his spine that made moving him difficult — transportation would be the key to successfully executing this bucket list wish. The family had already inquired about private-pay ambulance transport, but the quote they received was overwhelming — several hundred dollars, maybe even a thousand. Gathering a team of individuals (Larissa Williams, Dr. Elizabeth Strauch, Jayne O’Brien and me), we discussed the patient’s condition and possible complications. We determined that the request was reasonable as long as the patient was safe, and stable enough to make the trip. An evaluation by our Admitting Nurse, Debbie Breaux, confirmed that the patient’s symptoms were manageable, however it also revealed that pain management was a concern. Because of the expensive private ambulance quote, the man’s family had decided to transport him to the fishing pier in a family vehicle. He desperately wanted this last fishing trip, but we feared the car ride would cause excruciating pain. The only safe option was transportation via ambulance, so we started calling our contracted ambulance companies asking if they would consider a full or partial charity transport. Orion EMS came to the rescue. After gathering only a small amount of information, they immediately agreed to cover all transportation expenses in order to fulfill this last request! Arrangements were made to pick up the patient the very next day. Houston Hospice provided a wheelchair and oxygen for the patient to use during the trip. Hollie Sims and I assisted while Orion EMS transported the patient to his fishing pier. The water, the pier, the landscape—everything was perfect. The late summer sunlight shimmering from the water was matched only by the twinkle in our patient’s eyes. After he finished fishing, Orion EMS provided a safe and comfortable ride to the inpatient unit. This was a great collaborative effort by many people with a triumphant blessing as an end result—just another reason why we love this work so very much.
Thomas Moore, Houston Hospice Patient Care Manager
Is Profit Seeking Trumping Care? Nonprofit vs. For Profit Hospice
The truth is, most people don’t think about hospice at all until it becomes a necessity. The concept of hospice is relatively new in the United States. However, as the number of hospice providers grows, with varying degrees of quality, it’s important to be informed. Hospice places its emphasis on quality of life with care that’s tailored to the unique needs of each individual and their support network. When curative treatments cease to help, the relief of palliative care can bring a new form of hope for terminally ill patients and their families, as hospice services help them make the most of their time together. In 2007, research published in the Journal of Pain and Symptom Management reported that hospice patients lived an average 29 days longer than similar patients who did not have hospice care.
When it came to the United States from England in the 1970s, the hospice movement began as a grass-roots campaign to address the unmet needs of patients with terminal illnesses. The benefits of this care were quickly recognized by the medical establishment. In a 1978 report, a U.S. Department of Health, Education, and Welfare task force noted both the altruistic and practical advantages of government support for hospice care: “The hospice movement as a concept for the care of the terminally ill and their families is a viable concept and one which holds out a means of providing more humane care for Americans dying of terminal illness while possibly reducing costs. As such, it is the proper subject of federal support.” In 1982, Congress included a provision to create a Medicare hospice benefit in the Tax Equity and Fiscal Responsibility Act.
With hospice services covered by Medicare, what started as a purely charitable movement became a probable source of revenue. As a result, the number of for-profit agencies entering into the business of hospice has grown exponentially, with
alarming results. An article published by the Washington Post on May 3, 2014 entitled “Terminal neglect: How some hospices treat dying patients” reported that the quality of care provided by 
hospices varies widely. A Washington Post investigation analyzed Medicare billing records for over 2,500 hospices, obtained an internal Medicare tally of nursing care in patients near death and reviewed complaint records at hundreds of hospices. At many hospices, they discovered that little care was provided for patients most in need. The investigation ascribed this absence of care to skimping on nurses, and to the failure of these hospices to have access to a facility where continuous crisis care could be provided. The investigation found that about 18 percent of U.S. hospices did not provide a single day of crisis care.
The investigation noted that the absence of crisis care at those hospices stands in stark contrast to most others, where such care is common. Medicare payment rates and their unintended financial incentives may be responsible. Providing routine care such as semiweekly nursing visits can be very lucrative. However, symptom management that requires continuous nursing care or inpatient care can be financially draining and logistically problematic, especially for smaller agencies.
An area of great concern is the burgeoning growth of home health care businesses that offer hospice. “For-profit home care agencies are bleeding Medicare; they raise costs by $3.3 billion each year and lower the quality of care for frail seniors,” said Dr. Steffie Woolhandler, professor of public health at CUNY’s Hunter College, lecturer at Harvard Medical School. “Letting for-profit companies into Medicare was a huge mistake that Congress needs to correct.”
William Cabin, assistant professor of social work at Temple University and lead author of a nationwide study published in the August 2014 issue of the journal Health Affairs said, “While our study is the first to show that profit-making has trumped patient care in Medicare’s home health program, that’s no surprise. A large body of research on hospitals, nursing homes, dialysis facilities, and HMOs has shown that for-profits deliver inferior care at inflated prices.”
Researchers believe that most hospices are providing quality care and many nurses in the field consider palliative medicine as much a calling as a job. When the hospice movement took root in the United States, hospice practitioners were typically part of religious groups, or were community-supported like the Texas Medical Center’s Houston Hospice. However, since for-profit businesses have come to dominate the industry, early planning and investigation of hospice care options is a necessity.
Karla Goolsby
I Remember Tommy: Coffee, Cigarettes, Harley Davidson and Hospice
Patsy Piner
I remember the first time I saw Tommy. He came for a tour of the Hospice with his aunts. He sat on the couch in the first floor family room where he nodded off several times while I answered the many questions his aunts asked. When we walked down the hall of the first floor, Tommy made comments and had questions too, “Don’t put me in no pink girly room. Do you have an orange and black room? Those are Harley Davidson colors. Manly colors – loved and revered by bikers.” Tommy was a biker, had a Harley and loved to talk about it. He had plans to ride again – just as soon as he felt better. He was here to get his medicines regulated so he could get on with his life. This hospice stuff was an inconvenience he was dealing with begrudgingly.
Tommy was young, in his early forties, and had pretty much lived life on his own terms until brain cancer stopped him in his tracks. He had dealt with the treatments and surgeries the best he knew how, with blend of humor, reality, anger and denial. A kind of cocktail that he partook of each day just to keep going. Little doses of each when needed so he could hear what he had to hear, see what he needed to see and do what must be done. After his initial visit, Tommy was in the inpatient care center several times and we always knew when he was here. He had been a large man with an outgoing personality before cancer and treatments had taken their toll; his body had changed but his personality remained intact. He made his presence known.
Tommy was blessed by his loving family who took turns caring for him at home and being with him while he was here. The few times he was alone here, he had the volunteers and/or the staff jumping. We all knew Tommy. Ask anyone who met him while he was here what his two favorite things were and I am sure the response will be, “Coffee and cigarettes.” Tommy loved good coffee, particularly Blue Mountain from Central Market and his smokes. I could see Tommy from my desk, sitting outside drinking coffee, smoking, and visiting with his friends, old and new. A few times he managed to sneak out alone. He would sit on the bench, smoke a little and doze a little. On those occasions, I would walk over, gently wake him up, sit and chat for a moment so he could finish his cigarette safely. We would amble back to his room and he usually had me making fresh coffee before I went back to work. Old coffee was a no-no according to Tommy, so the Volunteer department bought a little coffee machine that made just enough to fill a travel cup. That was Tommy’s pot, Tommy’s cup and Tommy’s coffee.
When the last days of Tommy’s life were approaching, his family brought him back here for the end. I saw very little of Tommy that last time; he wasn’t going outside for a smoke and his coffee dispenser was idle. He was in his room on the 2nd floor quietly preparing to die. His mother held his hand and sang “Hush little baby, don’t you cry.” She wanted to be as close to him as she could get, so a nurse found a small plain wooden stool for her. She pulled it close to his bed and stayed there holding his hand and singing for hours. When the time came for Tommy to take his final breath, he did so while being cradled in his mother’s arms – one last time. After Tommy was gone, his mother wanted to do something meaningful in his memory. A simple wooden stool had made such a difference in her last hours with her son that she and her family and friends acted on a suggestion made by the nurse who was with Tommy when he died — every room should have a stool. Now, we have stools in every room and they are there because of Tommy, and his mom, and his family and his friends. Even though they are small plain wooden stools, there is nothing little or ordinary about what they will be used for. We will think of Tommy and his mom each time we see someone sitting on a plain wooden stool close to a bed, saying goodbye. —Patsy Piner is the Houston Hospice Volunteer Coordinator