Posts Tagged ‘blue hair

The Ugly Car

On My Way Home

After a particularly harrowing Friday in the Volunteer Department, my coworker Ruth decided we should go home early as a reward for making it through the day. I was ready to bolt when Ruth told me she had a little side trip for me to make “on my way home”. The wife of a patient needed a ride, and according to Ruth’s brain, they lived close to me. I gladly accepted the assignment with gleeful thoughts of getting a jump-start on Houston’s Friday afternoon traffic mayhem.

Eager to leave early, I immediately went to the patient care center to meet the patient and his wife. I was a bit shocked when I noticed Mrs. G.’s aqua hair — not be confused with the socially acceptable “blue” tint of my grandmother’s social set. That should have been my first clue about her unique personality. But no, I trusted Ruth and forged ahead not thinking twice that a lady with aqua hair might be rather ‘interesting’. Her frail husband thanked me repeatedly. They were such a cute, sweet little elderly couple, and taking her home was a small price to pay for getting to leave early, or so I thought.

She Gawked at My Car

I slowly pulled my almond gold PT Cruiser with the chrome package out of the garage and stopped in front of Mrs. G. who was waiting in her assigned spot. She gawked at my car, then at me and cruiser_pehesitated before she finally got in. She looked from side to side as she inspected every inch of my car. Then, she shook her head and said, “My friend and I wondered who bought these ugly little cars.”

There are two camps when it comes to PT Cruisers, love or hate, no in between. Mrs. G. was definitely on the hate side. She told me about every two minutes how ugly she thought my car was. She could not understand why Chrysler made such an ugly car. Her husband had a Chrysler and it ran good. Chrysler made nice, dependable, cars but she had no idea what they were thinking when they made these ugly ones. Deriding my car was only interrupted with detailed driving instructions. “Stay in this lane, don’t pass that bus, slow down, turn here, watch that!”

Nice People Drive Ugly Cars

When we finally entered her neighborhood, which was nowhere close to mine, driving instructions and ugly car comments were complimented by a running commentary on the stores where she shopped, where they got their gas, where they bought auto parts for their good looking Chrysler and what streets had potholes. I inched along, dodging every aforementioned, pre-announced pothole. About half way down her lengthy street, Mrs. G. pointed to her house. It was the one on the left where three men stood on the porch eyeing my car. “They’ll never expect me to be in this thing,” she giggled. All three men rose as we approached. Through squinting eyes one of them recognized Mrs. G. and came to open the door for her. Before getting out, Mrs. G. took one last wide-eyed gander around her and announced, “I’ll have to tell my friend that nice people drive these ugly cars!”

As I left Mrs. G. and her three friends, I called Ruth. She did not answer. She had left early, without any side trips.

—Patsy Piner

 

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